I think I need this.

:Today I dropped Brad off at the airport at 7:20am... He will be in Atlanta until Wednesday night.

:On my way home I decided that I was going to the "Red Box" to rent some movies that I have been dying to see but Brad always says NO when I whine to rent them...

I decided on 2.

1) The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

2) A Cloudy Chance of Meatballs

:So far I have watched the first and then was compelled to tap a long nap...

:I had one particular dream of me being Daisy where I was feeling so much love for someone unconditional and in that dream I was living life to it's fullest... I was her on that mattress on the floor with my glass of wine in my hand laughing and living.

:Living life to it's fullest is something that I have a hard time grasping.

I feel like my life is not where I want it to be.

But I can't figure out what is missing. Why I can't just live and be happy.

I know that this was just a movie and I am not the only one feeling this way but I do feel so LOST and ALONE trying to figure out why I can't just live and be CONTENT.

con⋅tent

[kuhn-tent]

–adjective

1.	satisfied with what one is or has; not wanting more or anything else.

2.	British. agreeing; assenting.

3.	Archaic. willing.

–verb (used with object)

4.	to make content: These things content me.

–noun

5.	the state or feeling of being contented; contentment: His content was threatened.

6.	(in the British House of Lords) an affirmative vote or voter.